The Fanning sisters were both given a "time out" today when arguments over who got to rock the pink parka and Ugg boot look on Main Street escalated into fisticuffs.
The comprimise decision, that Dakota would be allowed an additional accessory in order to differentiate herself from the young upstart Elle, pleased some sisters more than others.
1. Wrap yourself in a dominatrix's shower curtain and cradle it like the baby you'll never have with Justin Timberlake.
2. Hold that crystal tear drop of dubious honor right under your eye, symbolically reminding America of all the heartbreak you have suffered and sobbed over in the past year.
3. Pick it up high, exhibiting the ease with which you can do so, and tilt it back ever-so-slightly, so as to alert certain better-award-encumbered cast members that you can and will throw this thing at their bitchy attention-stealing heads should the situation call for it.
Seriously. Who is this person?
I mean, sure, people made fun of her before. But it was because they cared. She was like...America's slow little sister. But now? Dear god, she's got the warmth of a porcelain doll. She's deader in the eyes than Eugena. Even worse, she might be more effed up than Jessica. And that's hard. Because Jessica actually tried to date John "your body is a puking wonderland" Mayer and failed.
Joking aside, how sad is it to see a perfectly attractive young woman do this to herself?