Say "I love you" just after a person is out of earshot.
Slam a door on someone after hitting them with an angry zinger, then put your back against the door and slide down it to a seated position on the floor, sobbing.
Consistently refer to the father of a friend's son as "Him" or "He," like just the thought of their name offends you.
Stock up on candles and see if your city officials can arrange a blackout.
Offer your opinion on anything and everything. Loudly.
Fire your mother from the CEO position you gave her at your super-successful clothing company. When she reminds you that she's part-owner of the company, stick your fingers in your ears and tell her to back off. Look around your flagship store (in small-town North Carolina) with a sense of contentment, allowing a masked ninja to break in and mug you. Tell your friends that your bruises, including two black eyes and literal handprint-shaped arm wounds, are the result of having fallen down some stairs. Get a gun. Practice shooting, a lot. Look both simultaneously strong and determined and victimized and full of self-pity. Shoot some more.