riverside, ca. = hell?

I learned 3 things from watching the NBC disaster drama 10.5.

One. Earthquakes will physically chase you whether you're on a bike, train, or any other type of vehicle by which you might escape. Especially if you are on a train. The earthquake will relentlessly pursue you until it has completely gobbled you up into the bowels of the Earth with never a toot to be heard again. As if quakes weren't scary enough! Now, if NBC has their way, quakes are going to start jumping out of the shadows and stealing old ladies' purses by switchblade.

Two. To become an OR Surgeon during an apocalyptic time, all you have to really do is say sponge, clamp, and suction during any surgery. And these words can only be said individually without cushion content of actual medical terminology. Example: "Hey, Doctor Miracle, how's that new Mercedes - clamp - working out for you? I really like - sponge - beautiful women." Definitely try to combine two of those words into something like suctionsponge or spongeclamp and you've made the journals. Plus, you should always attempt to condense a 9 hour surgery into a half hour because it will make you a hero and all the other doctors will be totally jealous.

Three. Riverside, California and the surrounding San Bernardino area is really Hell. As soon as I heard Dr. Hotchick mention Riverside and SB, I knew things weren't going to be good. And not only in TVland do these places bring about fear, but in real life too. I swear that everytime I turn on the news someone in Riverside has been shot, stabbed, hit and runned, fallen off a mountain, buried in a mudslide or burned to a crisp. And now, once again, Riverside and the surrounding area is up in flames! If this place isn't Lucifer's homeland then I don't know what is. What's up Riverside? Your name implies a peaceful dreamy "riverside" community filled with laughter, ice-cream, and barbershop quartets. Yet I see only smoke and flames and the black shroud of death. And you've succeeded in lighting your poor neighbor Cerritos on fire as well. I understand that at least 10 homes have been destroyed and probably at least 500 used car lots will go too. What will we do without the beloved Cerritos Auto Square? Their jingles bring joy to thousands of radio listeners each day. Get it together, Riverside, and stop suckling the sour teet of Satan.

Comments

[tony]

Another reason " Rivertucky" is hell is that it seems as if every third house ( or trailer) is a crystal meth lab. Kids who grow up there become used to seeing the neighbor's place erupt into a spontaneous fireball. Fun!

[The Matt]

I learned that watching a four hour miniseries in 20 min with tivo makes it actually kinda bearable!