..That in a 21-floor office building, I work on one of the six floors that has a defibrillator. Because I'm a hypochondriac and the elevators here are slow, y'all.
Also -- there's now a 5% greater chance that I'll have a legitimate reason to yell "Clear!" on any given day (no actual math done in the calculation of that figure).
Hooray! Or , in the eloquent words of one of Duke's two fight songs, "rah rah rah rah rah ra-rah ra-rah"! Nathaniel J. Ames (not an accurate spelling) has replaced assistant coach Johnny Dawkins on the Blue Devil bench.
During my time in beautiful Durham, North Carolina, Nate James was my favorite Duke basketball player. I was always promising my friends that each ensuing year we were there would be, without a doubt, the Nate James breakout year we had all hoped for. Some post-season heroics in 2001 finally made me an honest woman, and now 7 years later (7 years, sweet Jesus!) Mr. "J.Ames" is breaking out further to thoroughly shmawesome affect.
And so, this seems as good a time as any to share my most embarassing Nate James moment(s).
It goes like this: My senior year roommate's brother was on the basketball team. She, therefore, knew the basketball team. And whenever she saw someone on the basketball team, she would make introductions.
SUPER sweet, right?
Yes.
...Except when you have been introduced to one member of the team (umm...Nate James) as "his biggest fan" on multiple occasions. Then, it just starts getting creepy.
I guess the point of this story is: thanks a lot, Ann.
Saint Mineato came to this point in Florence after being beheaded in the presence of the Emperor, picking up his newly-unattached noggin, crossing the Arno river and walking up a (trust me) incredibly long and steep hill.
We, on the other hand, arrived after a leisurely train ride from Rome and a stroll past the Duomo.
Meanwhile, back in America, I have a new job (for now...I don't like to get to comfortable, given my checkered past). It's here. And yes, you are correct. I have at last made One Tree Hill watching my bizniss.
...Italy! (well, like in 15 hours or so).
While I am gone, would someone please track down Rockapella on whatever coffee commerical set they're hanging out on these days and enlist them to sing the title of this post accurately? You have 8 days....go!
I think this picture implies the Veep has a void, an emptiness inside, that requires filling.
Or, that no one wants to sit near him.
Witnessed, at Beacon: A woman who, at the end of her meal, dug measuring tape out of her purse, checked her waist and then complained to her waiter that he had served her food so delicious that she had gained an inch.
It was an act so insane that it almost erased from my memory the earlier overheard conversation at the table next to me, wherein another woman told her date she loved acting because it "brought her closer to the human experience."
Britney Spears was just on How I Met Your Mother, and I didn't have to care.
I think that's this cloud's most silvery lining yet.
(But, since I'm here and talking about it: she wasn't bad. Kinda cute and sweet. Mainly, she didn't scream "stunt casting to ensure our season three pickup!" quite as loudly as I had feared she might)
...That five years of unnecessary and costly war would wear on a man. To that, I'd simply say: You don't know Cheney.
SO... Duke has limped to the end of the season, got an undeserved 2 seed, and is at great risk to not make it out of the tourney's first weekend. I'm totally not bummed about it though, and it's all due to this bizarro shit that ESPN did with the ACC tournament package. Please, enjoy, and hope along with me that no one got fired for this:
"He was busy breeding ravens."
Thankfully, the brilliant work of look-alike Jeffrey Weissman and the cunning use of already-shot footage allowed Crispin to pursue such ventures.
*We were watching Back to the Future II at his insistence. And, as it must always be said when Back to the Future II is referenced, "The Doc's aliiiive!!! He's in the Old West....but he's ALIIIVE!!!"
...this made me happy.
Tina Fey coming out for Hills, I drink your milkshake continuing to sweep the nation (I drink it up!), and the debut of Creature Comforts alum Casey Wilson...kind of a rocking SNL, overall.
But Step Up 2 The Streets surpasses the original. And, possibly, every Oscar-nominated film this year.
...You needed any further reminder that a vote for Hillary means lady parts in the White House, here it is, via the all-important Traveling Pants endorsement.
On a personal note, I am so glad Tibby and Carmen have been able to move on from the drama of dead-too-soon summer friends and parental remarriage. Also -- is Kostas an Obama man, and is Lena's family angry about it? Because I've heard that in this life, family is the most precious gift we are given.
...Family, and a magic pair of one-size-fits-all pants.
...Has me thinking about one of my favorite songs, and how it's attached to one of my favorite videos.
(wait for it. it'll make sense)
Happy New Year! Here's to Cheney going out in '08 with a smirk and a bang.
10. Don't go breakin' my heart, Cheney!
8. Words will never hurt me Cheney
7. Flossing does a Cheney good Cheney
4. Total eclipse of the Cheney
3. Funny, he never asks for a second cup of coffee at home, Cheney
Torso and legs = cold.
Shoulders and biceps = hot!
Forearms and neck = cold.
Fingertips = hot!
Either Ashlee Simpson is an impractical dresser (which I flat out refuse to believe) or Total Request Live is taped at a mystery spot.
...no, I am not talking about the romantic comedy starring Frank Whaley and a considerably curvier roller-skating Jennifer Connolly.
Nor am I referencing the Clash song of the same title.
Indeed, I am not making tea at the BBC. Or writing at Us Weekly for that matter. These days, I am an ever-so-cleverly titled Sixer.
Check it out, should you get the chance!
I didn't think so, but the electronic billboards on nearby streets seem to indicate otherwise. And that scares me. Because when "they" show "the future" in movies and such, it's never a happy place. It's a place where we're fighting robots, there's no water left and advertisements are downloaded directly into our brains, along with secret government programs that transform us into super-assassins whenever we hear a key phrase.
I'm just saying. I like my billboards static.
